Tuesday, 24 June 2008

Monday, Monday... Can't touch that day.

"Every other day of the week is
Fiiiine yeah,
But whenever Monday comes you can catch me crying, all of the time."

(The Mamas And The Papas)

Well, into every life a few ticks must crawl. Samba has ticks, as I discovered when I got back home from dropping the boys to school this morning. (The most frustrating thing about sharing one family car is the number of work hours I have lost. GAH!) (No no! THE MOST frustrating thing is missing my yoga classes which I have already paid for, because Sean says he will need the van, and then he doesn't go anywhere. Well, at least I get to spend good money on myself, which I don't often get to do, even if it is for FUCK ALL) I digress. (No, wait! I can think of some more frustrating things...) I gave Samba a good brush down, which produced enough hair to make a whole 'nother dog, as usual. Why isn't that dog bald? Every time I brush her, even if it's daily, I get a whole dog's worth of hair and she STILL HAS HAIR! I would give up and stop brushing her, but then the hair comes off anyway and collects under stuff and in our dinner.

I am going off on a tangent here. I was, ick, talking about ticks. WARNING! What I am about to tell you is gross!!

Chirpy likes ticks. She thinks they are the yummiest things ever. The big ones, she whacks against the ground with her beak till she can eat them. As I brushed the dog, every time I said "Eew," she came running. Isn't that gross? In a Pavlovian kind of way? Chirpy thinks that "Eew" means "delicious tick".

But Chirpy is TERRIFIED of those wads of dog hair that you take off of the brush! We were in the garden, and whenever a ball of hair blew her way Chirpy squawked with fright, leaped into the air with wings flapping and took off until I said "Eew" again.

Once all of Samba's ticks had been eaten or otherwise disposed of, (container of dishwashing liquid is my usual murder weapon, when Chirpy isn't helping) I sprayed Samba with Frontline. Frontline is the world's best invention. Hopefully Chirpy will not find any Post-Frontline Ticks crawling around and give herself food poisoning.

In other pet news, Frankie the old cat has a scaly, scabby thing on his face which is not very attractive. I asked the Splendid Vet about it, and he has prescribed pills. Have you ever tried to give a cat a pill? Anyway, I have bought the pills. If you never hear from me again, you know what happened.

Yes folks, with a week of Cat Medication, possible Chicken Bellyache, Hidden Ticks and a Poisonous Dog ahead of me, I will need all the sympathy I can get.

7 comments:

Theresa said...

Samba must be related to Alex, my cat. THE CAT HAIR!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH. I sweep 3 freaking times a day and ITS STILL THERE!!!

No ticks though, whew. I don't miss removing ticks.

And i would crush the pills up, then mix it in condensed milk. He licks it up himself. Zero effort on my side. Zero need to go all Freddy Krueger on his.

Anonymous said...

Dude,
the strong language
its not fun

Nan said...

Oh, boy. Censorship! Whose blog is this anyway??

GirlBlue said...

Pictures pavlovian chickie running at every ewwwww *funnest thing ever lol*

LOL at comment moderation.

eye in de sky said...

Pottymouth!

Tash said...

I'd suggest that any attempt to censor this blog should be done only by someone with the balls to let their identity be known!

Nan - I almost fell off my chair with the cat thing! Emailing you another one about cats and dogs now.

Nan said...

Anonymous censorship is no censorship at all!