*Thinks*... "Oooh, when I go out to hang up the laundry, I will lie on the trampoline in that nice warm Spring sun! By myself! Where's my bikini?"
Ahhhh, peace and quiet, wind chimes gently dingling, birds tweeting, warm sun, this is the li...
"AHA! A MAIDEN IN DISTRESS!!! FEAR NOT FAIR MAIDEN, I WILL RESCUE YOU!!!"
"No, no, I'm not in distress. Shoo."
"QUICK! SOMEONE DISTRESS THAT MAIDEN! SO WE CAN RESCUE HER!"
*Maiden pretends to be asleep*
"Maybe we could BOUNCE her."
"No, no, *whisperwhisper*" .... swishing noise as boys rub their hands on trampoline to build up a static charge...
ZAP!
"AAAAARGH! OW! You beasts!"
"AHA! FEAR NOT, FAIR MAIDEN...."
"I DO NOT NEED RESCUING!"
"You DO!"
"HA! From YOU! It was SO peaceful out here a minute ago. Go play videogames or something. NO, you cannot come on the trampoline.... NO! Fine, but you have to not move."
"Look! a helicopter."
"Quick! Make a landing symbol! Helicopters, land here!"
Aren't we all pale? They static-electrocuted their mother, but she is a sucker for snuggles in the sun.
This website was invented many years ago, when the author kept coming across interesting things in pockets whilst doing laundry. Like small, terrified reptiles. Blogging about raising children in the rainforest, moving them to the UK and watching them leave home one by one to have their own adventures has gradually been replaced by a return to grownup life for their mother, Nan Sheppard, who is an anthropologist, writer and public international law consultant.
Sunday, 10 April 2011
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10 comments:
Why do all males assume that every female is in need of a good rescue? Where are the fairy tales where in the maiden rescues the prince?
(Hilariously, captcha: the tale).
The Mother, the boys know how I feel about this... they grew up with fairy tales where the princess did the rescuing. Makes their 'rescue' more dreadful!
What I noticed- how big Chas is getting! And how good you look.
So .. they rub their hands on the trampoline to build up a static charge, eh?
Hmmmm. Gonna hafta file THAT one away for future reference.
Thank you, young Sheppards, for providing me with yet another diabolical experience to foist on unsuspecting friends and family in the future.
Lou, you are as bad as the Sheppard Adolescents.
Grandmother, I KNOW! They are getting so tall. And mature and sensible, too, most of the time!
Hope the beach was less full of knights in shining armour today!
womagwriter, there were a couple of twelve-year-old maidens there, so us mums were ignored completely... You should have seen the antics and showing off! Chas and Connor were very macho, and swam in the sea. Brrrrr....
What no spring cover pad or a net??? We just got Jaisons tramp, will try the static trick on my little beasts. But once the sun is on it it's more likely to burn your hands. The thing is unusable in the hot sun.
Miranda, I don't think the tropical air is dry enough to build up a charge. But you can try!
EEEGADS!! Can see your lily livers shining all the way to trinidad! I say you shuffle your be-socked feet on the carpet before you prod the little rascals to wake them in the morning! Glad you're getting sunshine my friend..enjoy it!
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